Relationships are a huge part of a person’s life, whether it is familial, romantic, or friendly. However, not all relationships are healthy. Some are toxic and destructive and those involved are rarely aware of it.
Literature has long been a source of guidance when navigating the murky waters of a toxic relationship. These books shed light on the red flags, gaslighting, and lies while also offering a path to healing.
Books About Toxic Relationships
Below is a collection of fiction and non-fiction books that examine toxic relationships from various angles.
1. Whole Again: Healing Your Heart And Rediscovering Your True Self After Toxic Relationships By Jackson Mackenzie
Trauma from a toxic relationship can manifest in different ways—a general feeling of numbness, depression, substance abuse, and more. Through knowledge gleaned from his work with thousands of abuse survivors, Jackson Mackenzie offers multiple strategies on how a person can heal, uncover their true selves, and be whole again.
2. When to Walk Away: Finding Freedom from Toxic People by Gary Thomas
One of the hardest challenges of being in a toxic relationship is knowing when to walk away. You devote yourself to meeting the needs of unhealthy people, delaying your own fulfillment and your life’s calling.
Using a mix of biblical and personal insights, Gary Thomas teaches you how to identify such toxic people, learn when to walk away, and keep a tender heart despite the toxicity.
3. Should I Stay or Should I Go by Ramani Durvasula
However much you dedicate yourself to a narcissist, they will always be more important than you are. The fairy tales might tell you about working for your happy endings, but there are things that you just can’t fix.
Through a combination of checklists, clinical data, and real-life stories, this book teaches you how to properly deal with a pathological narcissist. It tells you the many red flags you should watch out for and the ways that you can reclaim yourself.
4. Toxic Parents: Overcoming Their Hurtful Legacy and Reclaiming Your Life by Susan Forward
Parents can sometimes be the most harmful—invasive, vindictive, and dismissive. They use pain to discipline you, gifts to guilt you into submission, and words to make you feel you’ll never be good enough.
Adults who grew up with such parents often lack self-confidence, independence, and strength. In simple and clear language, Susan Forward talks about how these adults can free themselves from their parents and finally learn to be themselves.
5. Toxic People: 10 Ways Of Dealing With People Who Make Your Life Miserable by Lillian Glass
“Toxic people”—a term introduced into the vernacular by this book—are people who are miserable, who drive you crazy, and who do not wish you well. Dr. Glass classifies these people into 30 types, complete with wacky names such as “The me, myself, and I narcissist” and “Smiling Two-Faced Sneaky Back-Stabber”.
These are the kind of people you don’t need in your life but you always seem to encounter. Fortunately, Dr. Glass also provides 10 proven techniques for dealing with them successfully.
6. Emotional Vampires: Dealing with People Who Drain You Dry by Al Bernstein
Some people seem to have the ability to drain your energy dry, leaving you exhausted, frustrated, and emotionally depleted. Bernstein dubs these types as “emotional vampires”, who may come in the form of a spouse, a friend, and even your child.
Bernstein provides ways to identify the different types of emotional vampires and the toxic behaviors they inflict on others. He also offers practical strategies and coping mechanisms to help you deal with these people and regain control of your emotions.
7. The Talented Mr Ripley by Patricia Highsmith
Tom Ripley is a poor, young man who latches onto Dickie Greenleaf, whose glamorous world catches Tom’s attention. As he delves deeper into this world, his admiration slowly turns into obsession and jealousy.
Tom begins copying Dickie’s looks and mannerisms, hoping to appear richer than he really is. Unsatisfied with the illusion, he eventually takes his friend’s most valuable possession—his life.
8. Cat’s Eye by Margaret Atwood
Painter Elaine Risley returns to Toronto and is assaulted by memories of her past and the friendships that were both cruel and kind. Particularly Cordelia, who seemed to taunt and bully her for the sake of Elaine’s improvement.
In her reflection, Elaine must realize how these friendships shaped her current self and the only way to closure is to face the past she’s been running away from.
9. Rebecca by Daphne du Maurier
An unnamed maid marries a wealthy widower only to find herself tormented by her husband’s first wife, Rebecca. Despite being dead, she casts a long shadow over their estate and holds the housekeeper in thrall.
Alone in a household that seems unwilling to accept her, the bride must not only contend with the housekeeper’s obsession with Rebecca but also the mysteries surrounding the first Mrs. de Winter’s death.
10. The Girls by Emma Cline
Evie Boyd, feeling lonely and unloved, sees a group of girls who seem to exude an air of freedom. Fascinated, she is drawn to their chaos and is introduced to their cult and its leader.
Blinded by her desperation to be accepted into their group, she fails to realize the dangers of being in a cult and the violence it will bring to her life.
11. Lord of the Flies by William Golding
A plane crashes into an uninhabited island, leaving a group of schoolboys stranded and without adult supervision. Though they celebrate their freedom early on, they soon realize the dangers and necessities of survival.
As order collapses, they form alliances and social hierarchies. Enmity and distrust begin to breed, leading to consequences they will never be able to rid themselves of.
Escaping from Toxicity
Gaslighting, lies, and ignored boundaries—these are just a few signs that a person is dealing with a toxic person. However, while some of these are obvious to an observer, those in a toxic relationship struggle to identify them due to having normalized such behaviors.
The list above contains just a few of the many books that discuss toxicity in its many forms. They serve as guides toward freedom, methods of catharsis, and a reminder that everyone deserves healthier relationships.
What they do most though is inspire change. They encourage you to reflect on your relationships and nurture those that are positive and wholesome, making a world where toxicity is recognized and confronted a more likely possibility.
What books about toxic relationships would you recommend? Share them in the comments below!
If you enjoyed this post, then you might also like:
- 8 Signs of Toxic Relationships and How to Move Forward
- Stability and Intimacy in Relationships: How to Reignite the Spark
- Trust in Relationships: How to Build Trust At Home, At Work, and with Yourself
- 10 Best Self-Help Books for Better Health, Happiness, and Relationships
Cole is a blog writer and aspiring novelist. He has a degree in Communications and is an advocate of media and information literacy and responsible media practices. Aside from his interest in technology, crafts, and food, he’s also your typical science fiction and fantasy junkie, spending most of his free time reading through an ever-growing to-be-read list. It’s either that or procrastinating over actually writing his book. Wish him luck!
